Dear Julia:
I'm dealing with a spirit who stalks me both in my dreams and in my waking life via psychic visions. This has been going on ever since this idiot died. I hate him, as the idiot never was a dad to me at all. He was always drunk and often violent. When the idiot visits me in the dreamworld or via visions, I start cussing him out. I tell him to stay away from me and leave me alone!!! But that idiot will not respect me and just keeps stalking me. Other loved ones on the other side, like my granddad and grandmother, know about how this idiot is stalking me. Recently I psychically visited my grandparents and the idiot came over, but my grandparents shooed him away, telling me that they knew I wouldn't want to see him, and that they didn't blame me at all. What should I do? You're the only person I can think of who might know what to do when a spirit is stalking you like this.
- Steve
Dear Steve:
Your question reminded me of an experience my mother had long ago. My mom was naturally gifted as a psychic/medium, but never learned how to control her abilities. She thus had a lot of scary experiences, and eventually ended up turning off her psychic senses.
During a period in her life that I imagine was similar to where you are now, she was having lots of spirit encounters and spontaneous psychic experiences, and didn't know what to do with them. It was at this time that a friend of my father's died, and he began to "stalk" my mom. He would show up in her dreams or when she was in the shower and basically come on to her sexually.
This sort of thing happens sometimes when a few key ingredients are present. In your case, these are a relationship with the recently departed, the spirit remaining earthbound, and you being highly psychic but not yet in masterful control of your abilities.
Your continued animosity toward your father combined with the fear/resistance that these perceived stalking experiences generate is keeping your vibration low, which is making you vulnerable to this sort of experience and disempowering you from changing it. Further, the more you push against him (by calling him an idiot and hating him), the stronger you make him. Your negativity is both opening you up to him and feeding him energy.
In order to free yourself from this experience, you must lift your vibration above his. This may be hard for you to swallow, but the way to do that is to forgive him. When you can find forgiveness for him and truly feel compassion for his lost spirit, your vibration will lift, and like shadows are dispelled by light, he will disappear from your world.
Further, one reason your dad remains earthbound may be because of a deep need to make amends to you. Though he may not be very skillful in this regard, he may be longing for you to forgive him so he can move on in peace. I know this is easier said than done.
It is very important for you to learn how to master your own vibration anyway, for as a naturally gifted psychic, you will need that skill every day for the rest of your life. I learned this myself when I first began to awaken. I was often scared by my strange experiences; I didn't know what was happening or how to control it. This naturally drove my own vibration down. As like attracts like, my low vibration attracted lower entities, and the more afraid or upset I got, the worse it got.
To rise above these lower entities, we must raise our vibration. I've written extensively on how to do this in other editions. Obviously, calling someone an idiot is not high on my list of suggestions. Instead of cussing at lower astrals, we have to send them love. They may not accept it, mind you - in fact, most of them will be repulsed by it just as we might be repulsed by someone acting syrupy sweet. It doesn't really matter, however, so long as they go away.
Even though your father may not have been the dad of your dreams, you can find a way to forgive him. First, imagine what it would be like to be that lost and confused, and to have your own son feel about you as you feel about him. I'm sure you can hardly imagine anyone you'd want to be LESS than your father. Aren't you glad you are you and not him? Aren't you thankful that you had such a clear example of how NOT to be?
Wish him well and pray that he finds peace. Visualize meeting him in your next life and having a much brighter experience with him then. You don't want to carry this animosity forward.
This experience is alerting you that you need to learn how to raise your vibration at will and how to control your psychic sensitivity. Whether you're dealing with people or spirits who want to steal your energy, you must learn how to seal yourself off from unwanted advances. Where most people have to learn how to "open up" psychically, some of us are so naturally gifted that we have to learn how to "turn off" our psychic senses when it's not prudent to be so open. Remaining open all the time is like leaving your front door open; anything and anyone can drift right into your experience.
Affirm that your reality is under your control and nothing can affect you without your permission. You must also trust your instincts here. If you're ever uncomfortable, it's time to consciously use your spiritual knowledge and skills.
If you find yourself wandering into uncomfortable psychic territory and you can't seem to just lift yourself out of it, at the same time you raise your vibration, you'll want to get grounded. This will help you to be wise and practical about your own needs. Focus on physical tasks. Spend time in nature. Exercise. Go barefoot. Go to (positive) movies, eat healthy food, work in the garden, do some manual labor, clean out closets, etc. Spend time with people who have a lot of common sense. Surround yourself with positive but practical influences.
When you're not consciously using your abilities, affirm that they will naturally go dormant UNLESS there is something important and beneficial you need to perceive. This is how I walk through everyday life. I'm not "on" all the time, but if there is something I need to pay attention to, my abilities will kick in.
To shut your psychic senses down, just visualize your aura being solid instead of open or permeable. Also, visualize your third eye quietly "closing" as if it is going to sleep. Get very grounded in your body and focused on this physical plane of existence.
It's also wise to create a strong relationship with your spirit guides and then just trust them to filter psychic energies for you. Like your grandparents, they can not only help you in the moment, but also arrange for your future experiences to unfold as you desire. They will then facilitate communication with those you desire to interact with and serve as "bouncers" for those spirits you don't want to deal with. You've got psychic bodyguards - use them!
Be aware, however, that if you have issues to resolve related to your father, and it is not in your best interests to "avoid" him, your spirit guides will do what is best for you. Thus if you have this sort of relationship established and your dad still gets through, you will know that there is something important you're supposed to be doing there, such as making peace with him.
It's wise to set a conscious positive intention every time you open up to Spirit or your psychic awareness. I did this for a long time, and now I simply have the expectation that I will only have positive experiences, and that is working just fine for me. When doing readings, however, I still set a positive intention, fill myself with divine light, connect with my guides, say a prayer for what I desire, etc.
May you master your divine gifts and find peace through the power of forgiveness!
- Julia